Fashion Modif

it's interesting that, with all the thousands of words in the english language

I still cannot find the right one to say how you make me feel

maybe like this...

breathless

magic

burn together

exhilerated,

refreshed

alive ,

again

dream

home

Ferti(lies)

Yesterday our hearts fell together from an amber lit sky

floating heavenly into a violet downward spiral

flying down and deeper down past where I loved you

and past where I love you

Past the tear filled sea

painted black, drenched in raven's breath

too fast to say goodbye if not for just one more (eternal) time

the time at which our hearts disinegrated into the other's enemy

Down, down, deeper down

down through the underground (but there is no velvet to see)

red tinted blood spiked in black

My heart crashed down into the realm of reality

Falling into our own silver ashes-no incline-just falling

down into the chamber of cries

glowing in red by the shine of the devil's eyes.

"Surprise, Surprise," he told my heart

he set you free because he admired your lies

And now that you're gone, there is no sky.

embedded in my heart, you are: alive in my mind

lining my veins with silk, painting me with your beauty

you are what is free to me, you are light, you are the sky,

if only I wasn't color blind

who is chained, you or I?

you could not be imprisoned if you tried

I would plant a flower for each color you showed me how to feel

but only you can fertilize beauty that is real.

I am the grey flower left

still dying in the garden beneath your feet

burried alive in love's ashes

your heart implanted in mine forever

though just in translucent memory.

-MM

Jan 24

Jan 25

free

abandon

desire

looking

natural

spirit

...still no words to convince myself this is real

-Peter Sutherland

This weekend, well, actually, Saturday only, was pretty eventful and nonetheless, fun. An annonymous friend of mine and I drove to LA to see The Company of People group exhibition of Space15Twenty in hollywood. The show, though small, was very interesting and, for the most part, lived up to my highly anticipated expectations.

The exhibit featured a variety of art medias including photography, collage, painting, etc. by some of my favorite artist from the web site including Landon and Christina Metz, Jonnie Craig, Mitchell Spider and Andrew and Peter Sutherland.

My pieces in the show were the collages created by Peter Sutherland and the hauntingly beautiful photography of Christina Metz.

Unfortunately, due to extreme parking difficulties (middle of Hollywood on a Saturday night and resistance to paying $10 for an hour of parking) I was not able to hear the bands, I.U.D. and O.G.O.D. perform.

-Hannah Metz

However, if you live somewhat close to L.A. the exhibition will be showing at Space15Twenty from now until March 7th.

Prior to the gallery, my friend showed me this neat little bookstore called, Family located on Fairfax in Hollywood. The store had a very antique, artsy kind of vibe and was filled with an abundence of awesome zines, independent (and very hard to find) magazines like the I discovered, The Journal, and interesting art books, comic books, posters, clothing, and music. If you are ever in the LA area, definately a great place to stop.

Check out there website/blog for purchases, info., location, etc.

familylosangeles.com

Some cool new art I discovered while browsing through Family...

Eddie Martinez

Artist and tee-shirt illustrator, Carlos Valencia.

To finish the night off with a bang, we stopped at the legendary Hollywood landmark, Pink's Hot Dogs on La Brea and Melrose.

Again, if anyone is making a trip to the LA area any time soon, Pink's is definately an iconic location yummy american classics and a good experience.

Be warned however, that

1. You will probably be waiting in line for a minimum of 45 mins. depending on what time frame you decide to go. (We waited for about 50 min. at 9pm on a Saturday night.)

2. They do not accept credit cards: cash only.

I mention this because, it would suck to wait in that long ass line only to realize after an hour that you have to go to the ATM on the next block and then re join the ever blossoming line.

However, the line and lack of payment methods is well worth the delicious hot dog you will indeed, recieve. I got the classic Bacon Chilli Cheese Dog.

But, I have also tried the Brooklyn Pastrami and Swiss Cheese dog which was delicious, as well.

I hear that the Lord Of The Rings Dog (with BBQ sauce and onion rings) and the Millennium Dog (jalapenos, tomatoes, chilli, guac., onions, lettuce, and bacon) are also exquisite choices too!

"Pink's hot dog stand is a quick lunch, a nostalgic trip into the past, and a delicious experience."

Well, delicious as it may be, I woldn't anticipate this outing to be a quick meal by any means. However, in my experience, definately was a nostalgic trip to the past...

To be discussed:

Coachella 2010 Lineup

Overall, the lineup for this coming Coachella music festival in Indio, CA, is pretty decent, as usual.

However, last year, my experience was that it was much easier to select one particular day out of the three (FRI-SUN) due to the overwhelmingly incredible lineup that that specific day had planned.

In 2009 and I went on Friday and saw some great artists including Morrissey, Paul McCartney, M.Ward, Girl Talk, Connor Oberst, People Under the Stairs, Alberta Cross, Silversun Pickups, and The Ting Tings.

For this coming festival, I am finding it much more difficult to select just one day to go.

Each day seems to have a few beloved artists of mine however, I cannot go all three days.

For Friday, I think it would be awesome to see Jay Z, Grizzly Bear, Deadmau5, She & Him and Echo and The Bunnyman. For Saturday, the lineup is pretty promising: Camera Obscura, Dirty Projectors, Sia, GIRLS, Edward Sharpe and The Magnetic Zeroes, Beach House, Temper Trap, and MGMT (I guess...) are all bands whom I would love to see perform. But Sunday, though the selection is quite limited in my eyes, will be the day that Yo La Tengo and Matt and Kim play, which are two of my favorite bands.

Hmmm...

In other music news...

Current Playlist:

Jimi Hendrix-hey joe

Prince-darling Nikki

Lauryn Hill-killing me softly

Cat Power-I found a reason

Neil Young-heart of gold

Beach House-Gila

Bon Iver-skinny love

Regina Spektor-loveology

Joy Division-disorder

Pink Floyd-comfortably numb

R.E.M.-it's the end of the world as we know it

Air-playground love

When in Rome-the promise

READING LIST

This past week, I kind of went on a library and book/poetry reading binge.

I stumbled across this collection of poems by musician/singer/song writer/etc. Leonard Cohen. I was pleasantly surprised.

Thus far, the best ones that I have found are:

"Two Went to Sleep," p. 191

"You Do Not Have to Love Me," p. 221

"This is For You," p. 221

"When I Met You in the Small Streets," p. 232

*From "When I Met You in the Small Streets,"

Like jigsaw pieces married too early

in the puzzle we pried apart

for every new experiment, as if simplicity

and good luck were not enough to build

a rainbow through gravity and mist.

I also checked out Albert Camus: Notebooks 1951-1959, Eating The Honey of Words by Robrt Bly,

A couple of selected poem/essay collections of my favorite, T.S. Eliot, Early Writing of Ezra Pound, and my new and beloved favorite, Selected Poems 1945-2005 of the incredibly gifted and profound, Robert Creely. I mostly read all of Creely's work this afternoon simply because I became utterly enthralled by his poems and seemed to be physically incapable of pulling the book away from my lusty eyes.

Some favorites of Creely's:

"The Flower"

(I think I have posted this poem before because it is just SO good and the poem that really got me into him as a poet.)

"The Rain"

"Mind's Heart"

"Some Place"

"Numbers"

(This one is almost disgustingly good. It is pretty simple and kind of random but it just goes on as he shares his experiences and what comes to mind when thinking about certain numbers. Beautifully written and very relative to anyone, I think.)

Mind's Heart

Mind's heart, it must

be that some

truth lies locked

in you.

Or else, lies, all

lies, and no man

true enough to know

the difference.

The Rain

All night the sound had

come back again,

and again falls

this quiet persistent rain.

What am I to myself

that must be remembered,

insisted upon

so often? Is it

that never the ease

even the hardness,

of rain falling

will have for me

something other than this,

something not so insistent-

am I to be locked in this

final uneasiness.

Love, if you love me,

lie next to me.

Be for me, like rain,

the getting out

of the tiredness, the fatuousness, the semi-

lus of intentional indifference.

Be wet

with a decent happiness.

WOW!

Well, here are some recent poems of mine.

Love's Afterthought

every murmur in each of Summer's sky-lit after-thoughts
back when the sunset was simpe is written in cursive above me falling
from the troubled sky where your name is so boldy written in everything but
Times New Roman and every smokey exhale painted red by the stain of my lipstick
blows outward mixing with all the colors you painted the world-the surreal world
where we once searched at night for owls and where I once
searched for meaning hidden between the smoke of your exhaled by your heart's
mind tainted in poison pink perfume and just as the aftershock of the world of the pre-sunken
sky which is now dusted in blue ashes before it turns to eternal dusk and somehow through
the rippened vines the intertwining of branches like on the kelly green trees you helped
me see and just like how you connected the words happy and life and morphed them into
my reality and through the blooming of love and the breeding of misery their blossoming
branches poke at us to say that there is no reality hidden in the answers destined for reply
as they spy on us through the leaves ever so scrupulously while we litter love's ground
and how they can never healthfully bloom because of this and because of our sly manipulation
of sweet lies
Such beauty we saw in nature, you and me, and you and I weeping as we waved it all
goodbye
and like the wind blowing two star lit/star crossed breath into one: red (poison apple red)
exhalation of fear turning our backs on everything that was beauty (is) how you made me feel that is real
sucking life away and watching her die that is love
this too will not be answered not sooner nor later (this is forever) though we will never
rediscover the answer if not now than not ever as we watch
the flowers of the heart budding in sweet harmony in rainbow color though dying as if
to show us how to feel again (if not now than not ever)
the sky speaks no lies urging us in CAPS LOCK to look for the owls again
as if to remind us again
There is no forever.